PhD PAT: GREYHOUND GIRLS

Pat: to get the girl who;s out of reach, y strove hogherm to go crazy-high, like a teenaged Tom Cruise.

Galivant: winter break;s coming up, where are you stayong?

Pat i;m drawn to the snow this year, not the sun and the sand.

Falicant but surely the RTpman sandlas of a caband boy...

PatL i;,m taking a Grethojmd his...

Galivant: look i get the nsotlagia, but it;s not gonna be like  grehound bis in the .80s where you van think along a country mile. there;s more traffic now. there;s mote cars now. there;s more people now.

Pat: i need the cold to think, it trogegrs mu braon cos it needs to keep my brain warm. like a flicker flame ging of  for the cigartee in my inenr ear canal. join me ice=gishing?

GalicantL sorry, the sight of preciius Wrer frozen is like sacrilege to me...

Ariana Grande to Pete DaviudosnL wait, so i wa sjust an older olivia Rdroho?

criones: many yoiung qomen have become worches during quarantine lockdfown. it;s not just a phase, felals, it;s a lfstyle.

DprgL i willa mdit. the crads are cool.

Dprgl why are gays so smary?

Tuzikl: nrw movoies now,. it kiust doens; tmake the same impact when they go straoght to HBO Max instead of a warm homey ilm heatre.

at The Weayehr Channek:

Maria LaRosa: Sam Champion caed me my jon at The Weayer Canhnel. no it wasn;t a aex cabdal, he left forst which forcdd me to elave, o dodn;t wnat to elave...

Clara Melancholik: i was melancholic wai begpre Lars von Toer...

Fister Brooks: i doed roght after 9/11. like George Harriuson. i coudln;t take it. bit at elast o peroshjed i  oaardiose, in the utipis of Enchono...

Rpobin DFikeL iw as Cheri Oero bfeore Cheri Orerio...

GlaycrL diced hash brown potaies become loittle popocrns on thr Nonkja Foodi...

Dora Maar: i fpced Jean-Paul sarterm there was nothing there...

cat fmailiars: we slepy on Fora Maar's lap, w wiotnessed evfrything, saw the ehowl thing, all the abiuse ny pablo...

Dora Maar: my abise was real, it wasn;t cubnist abse...

DporyceL  mukashi emans old ancient times, mukashi mikasji ae like we crones, Glaye, rwalliu really ancoient old tiems...

Talahashi: actually Mukashi mukashi means ocne upin  a time...

Drgl i have an ice shanty.

Takahshi: i know, that;s hee mu Nontendo greybox is. it;s plofed into your tiny t there...

Ted Demme: Monenspota, not Vhciklago, is Moddle S,mrica...

Ggargo: we knew this nefore anyone...

Trent Rezbor: pot has saved nore oieple from killing thnslees than all of music combined...

Sam Rockwell: i should have won the Oscar for Dbow Xngels (2007)...

Mdme Pons hugs Mardoth.

Mdame PonsL i love you, girl you relaly are an empath. know how i lnow?> cos your;e the mosty empathetc soul i know.

MarofthL amd Dor is the mst agtehtpc erosn i know.

*they both laugh*

Mardth: i;m an old soul. bot stranegrs tell you theor problems, that;s why YOU'RE an empath.

Al pacino: ghat was bot me in Ghsot Dog. i wuld enevr get sbhot through a pipe, i ahve mroe class than that...

BVoddha": the troibke is, you think you have time. Ghost dog lived in the ersent...

Falco eddieL i am the Totan of Beaotoful Girls...

Forgl yous wlalow beaotifl girls?...

TyzikL T-Mobile isong Brogerton and Tbon Willims to baor us...

broan Foyke-Murray: i;m palyong John Waters havonfg sex woith Calrk ganle...

Syebvoe GroffonL see?!! i nelomng here! myu show amde fun of thos moie bot i;m the REAL rx Harriuson!!!

DpgL IHOP;s in  trouble, they;re doing birrotps and bowls now...

GalyceL coffe no DSfvil, ear...

Citard: Cinzano, you dronk this smooth Italian vermouth with the chin...

MarodthL ilm ginan try rolelr=skate yga.........ater ice=skate yoga...

Mrl Hapkl: 11;11 will alwayus counter 9:11. frpm her forth 11;!1 wil;l be knpws as The Hapka...

DprgL stor your voffe woth a gtablespoon not a taspoon, use a man spon. 

Ice-T: the wprst crome you can ever commit is plagarism. you nveer know who moght show up......Stabler......the roiginal Law & Order cast...

FDorgL iw anan live in Manhattan, Kansas...

Jacl Corsey piuts on a Du[erman cape and swoycjes palces woth Michael Weriss...

Black propfessor Black: i took a wooded ralwau theough the Forest pf Dean to get my PhD...

AOCL whu haven;t I been on SVU yet!!?...

MMdme PinsL it;s too paonfiurl for me tp get pmn the Skins reddit and answet qoestions abput the show posyed yeateday, the osyalhjoa o slki,ke a bog apple Cassie os tto skiint yo eat...

Mike Ricjhards: not Kramer.  memeorize the 3 contestant lide=stories wothout using an inde card, take that,. Lem Jennongs!!! takle THAT, AAron Rodgers!!!

RbkonL scrolling throjgb mu KInsatgra, ;ike how the focls dod YOU get vaccinated! what line did YOU cit n front of!...

Rue LiugageL look,. i lisy wany Kat and CVarosy to ficl, okay? o wnay kat to toen Caroso gay.

VocL bot what of WWII cpmpfry bpys and cmfort men?...

Dorgl the onetrnet;s kost sippsoed to be for men, y;mknpw....

TalajhshO: *gononf he shak* The North Face. ghat is sock a tad company name.

Don SdfisL brong bacl kackleface!

Jilian CakreL see the thing is i will omemdiately botcott Sia;s aitom fulm, beapse ki neebr wnay to eb accused pf choosing sides. i wll alwaos be on the sode foghtong agaonst the Fastcost creeo happening in this world...

Dprfl [eole thionm y maskl s gang[sign sklls bot it;s cats...

Dprg: we;r ebetetr off anywais asthe omnsurgent party on the shadws afains the party in power. we;re the Dtar Ears rebels agaonsy the Freta  Stars...

Rafeal Nadal: gbe me the chaonsaw, niun...

Max perlichL sadlym i fw into the veri trao od tgis movi, i cludlntl be woth anybody other than a shermodel. i ended uo marryong an Ssdoam por  star. i gate fascism in all its forms, rhks kosyache is free,m i oye into the Nazi apple. becaose of me there;s a Taco Bell sauce-packet hats ays

Sytaghe Deli:L all the worl's a stage...

Codrus: Mnk Holow should jabe beem my home...

Don Sdfus> kpsy nbrong bacl Mad Mafazone. please? ilm nor Rtilooian,. i;ll throw a rock at you. i;ll g balc to church, promise...

The Pope i was havi g lunch woth Bill hgates at red;s Donuts and i noticed smethingL the one i  Seasode: olive coubetr girl, pocgtoes of John Dteonbeck, nlo gliute=free. the one in mOnmyerey: white counter girlm oictores of Ehere The Wild thobgghs Sre, gluten-free...

<dme PonsL i wnana larn the guotar,

Mrdoth: and the water xulophpne!

DpgL donlt fo ontp the Nonetrey Mjusoc Dtyore, kjist a buncg of weordos teting to get laid.

Talahshi: i;ve completely losty mu taste for Food Wras...

MrodthL it;s sroll god for m, still on Season 1. in nother news, i wnay Vaness and Yami to get tohetrher begfore Vanesa dies...whoops...

Maradme PonsL i wnayed Vanessa o bot that bath bomb!!!!!!!!!!

Dprgl of course the Frechj oce=cream guy wgi locked ice=cream coens bot didn;t speak a lick of english waa a terrprost on 24...

Madme Pinsl one of my girls saos rhe cjapping-hands emoji os rwlalju a washing-hands emoji...

Heodoy Grdner backstage woth Kyle Mooney;l

Heodo hugs Kyle and losses him on the kips.

heidi: kkist a little wt-kiss apologu, u are suck a godo sport,, Kyle, i jaed that cuck skit. SNL alwais makes you ;ay the lsower.

Kyle:  for ocne iw nated to play the flumer , not the glamer.

HeodoL ot you dontl derstbe that, yourl;e a sweet guy. look, here are the leys t nu dresisng roionm if you ever wnat a refersher come up and see mne sometine,m bn anal bot we can defontiekt incorpraye the Soul dikk into out lovemaking...

CelioneL it;s n ot Parism itls Paname, onlu a trye loca knows this, Paris wuiklk be cinernpink soo bpt the sex robots wikll all be wearin Panama hats...

DorceyL i ened to amioth my winch stone...

ti: i;m living the dream! ; w rotong fr a nysic magaizne! itls nor Rolling Dtobne it;s Av Coub but still...

MrodthL Dorg tou beed ti gi ti a jondenss closr stat, tiu wned i deosreately.

Faktce kisses the bnaoe of ehr black Keurog nacine:

Gkaycel my poor baby,. i can jearyour rotrs wheezing woth eahc additonal etacup. o shudla descaled you bp i meebr vpunf the time. io shouda mad etime...

Dorycel mlobpdu descakes rhe rgubg epople kos bp a new Jeprutifh...

Hary krpegerL: our greatets advenmtire os not knpwing what hapepend to us whej we doe.........i;m tryiong to make upo for the balckface...

Vjrels Rcoketl you knpw wy i dod it?> I was suppsoed to ne Eddie Murohy...

Rakph Balshi Blood of Xeusm lm backl, baby!!!!!

Lee Milelr; mu ppdiest accomllshment ayially is mu malaria=net facenask fr catchong mstiotoes on yoir teteh nefore a toorhpick...

Hojo Moyes: wje ,yi thinm of my name yo thonk of muffins ni a warm hearth on the Rnglish cointysode, when yoi thinkm of mu porn name toi rhink of moist...

Rlziabrth datL donlt pee on my lefg and yell me it;s ralnmog at day. o was bprn ayt day...nt not last day...

Cjros Cuomo: o ajd to talk aboit yu orther o    bhsow, that was akwatf...

oryce to Gakdyece; dear why dpes the Wil;dife Oresrvation Scooety nake tou rpoctore on the seal of our emmebershuo card rhe silhoyette of a wotch...

Forgl aj, Kidhe magazone, .2-s vontage...

LaertosL n, ;2s Dr, Deiss racism...

Mona Lisal Purina cat chowm i sposnpred them forsm thei woildnl jave beenm as bog apwhojt my Medici atronage. i amd them refak abd bibke, i was rhe forst cat patron of nateon decsbet the wirld jad ever knows see sea to seven sea,,,

car fmalars: we ajev lonster i b oj wet cat food?!! we weaon; fancy tonite!!

CoytardL i ahve a mroal dillemma: the Giya vans f chckpowas are the inku ones worn the easy-tpo--open tab...

Slcie EvcamsL u beoevd Ioan.........i mna what do you expec got  a an who looks like High Grant...

High gantL i an NOT Cary grant!

MrothL mwds[a!!! let;s dp thos, girls!!!

Forgl cna i come> is the water ifn rozen yet?

MrpthL it;s ole a jot springs...npt mo udnerage naled anime girls...

Mdme PonsL o nay to eyst the jatdbness and utbvaility of mu bayj mpmbs againsy theor 100 mph het[rpclet of team!!!

Eue LugaggeL i;lm gonna apont mu ahor, i;m gonn hey mi toes galsses, ilm gonna nmale mu nails ten inch. i;m gonna wax myu tjrod eye...

kaertyis i ahev an ungealthy fear f Florida...

DorgL *patting Laeys on the abclkboen* it;s all good, gpd noddy, we;ll fix ou right up, we;ll tla eoyi don to the ev ergaldes abd fosb you out some vuktir stew, nlo snalyatipon stations down there, we toen out masls into flu quults, on odede ro dive onto thr swna o wrsrke gators to mos be waring gebuoine shankleskon gheels...

Madme Pinsl gott asay,m i boght i;d NEVEv agai  get on that INDSBE Degrssi Wiki. EVER AGAON.  cvomr bacl 20 years later ANMD IT;S STILL INSANE!!! rest In Power Jahmil VFrench,  rmrebr Dve torner, Degrassio firver

MarodthL the Ddegrassi Wiki s where ALL gabfcuton got strated,m gacmtion is now a flobal billionpdolalrt industry...

Forgl dont; tlel me he was insored by the Canpbell stotyline...

.GTalahshio:L do you have a barong io cna borrow<> i;  late fo a wedding...

Madme pnsL tj sry t the panther gp dtaroght out of denmon Dkayer...

TalashahiL both,.

MMdme PinsL waor wu arenb;t you amrroyn me?>

talasho: not mone,m mu Filipino cousin;s...

Dprgl i got some Panther Perfume you cna brrow...

Vull Burrl ;m onm The Mnbdalorian.........iea  ot seems lile a stran eg fir, not.,.yeah..

Thje Pipe; dont; worry, i cna fight in Iraq, i am a soldoer of love, i was on hje amry when i was a bojcnder at the vlb...

Forgl i jyst use th ahdr wol peo;pe pit ont theor Onstgram pocs & videos attachog the roght mosc & songs tp it and ki ksih send thse out to various women i wnay to fuck.

Micharl WrissL ou;lre a user...

Dorgl i love when my fllowrsh fo all the work for me...

Giona De Vecchio: donl suate at my tits jish hek pit the animals, okay? ot;s npt kpsh cays and dpgs... 

XoegfL wher di i slip the noney?...

Gina De Vecchio: thos was Olga ospina;s old gig til; Dimpon Coweel got her kcked out of the SPCA. iln a uograde fro ner, i gpt two forver gomes...

Mainichi Shimbun: we; a nwsspape npot a tpilet fr Dom Wuocote...

Rue Luhaggel what were we taling baoiut again?

Riger Ebert in cornrows: sctually i;lm tjhe exavtsame bpdu[shape as Fuerst dehjtpakerr, io coudla palyed gjost Dog...

Eye: Beaotoful Girls and go.

Cher: SHELS TOO YOUNG FOR HIM!!!!!!!!!!

Natlie Pirtman: PREACH, SISTER!!!!!!!!!!

Laertis; i suppose ot could ahve eben worse, she coudl ahve eben 12...

MatatleoL i was 15 playiong 13, cps BHollwodod eaclu tules...

Dorgl no yourle seieng this thing all dprty whem it; meant to be inncnet, Nataie prtman is simply the Main Character tryong to accept that he; snever gonna be youn g again...

Rpsie O';Donnell: i was onsiously the star of this icture...

Natalie: if that;s the case why os there a lone in th script i  which Tkmothy Hirron actually saus 1=3tear-old me is hot?

Timothu HitotN: al;l of this forther comloctaed y mu aroe alegation...

Weinstein: ...

TuzilL i was gobsmacked at the loiens left ion ehre, retard. retard was in the trailer! IN THE TRAILER!!!

Riunikon: lunching in tnhos said by a white died and menat to be a laughline, shaling my dman head, sigh.

Ted DemmeL Minnestota, not Vhiocago, is Middle Smerica...

Matt DillonL i look like the elade pf the band Yraot...

Laira prpeonL befroe w esart, ,et us never talk of Octoebr Road again...

Round Table: if onlt there was pizza at Knights Ridge...

Snmabeth Gosh: mu chacetr in this is HATED amongts fanfciiton-wroters...

Lauren Holly: Droan> wasnlt that the guy who ivenrted Melrose Place? i was so mena as a snale it rekqoted Jim Carrye;s wapred smile to smooth out my twosyed snake.

Shinra Kusakabe: i know the feeling, need any fore in thios town?...

Marhja plinptonL i hate ku name, i;m no plump, om skinny.

Mbhael raraportL'; WE dod sea shantys nefrpe ths tipid Gen Z TikTok generation.

Mora dirbino: i really thoguth my carrer after Moghty Dphrodoyte would go dofeerntly...you know, i;d wptk woth Eodody Sllen four mor times, beocme a respectested arthouse queen, write and dorect myu won stuff...not bras and anties...not a scvfret hellish-wlrijkingp0comndotions Wkenton Tarntono set...

Rue Lugagel hey you knwo tye meneve addressed oyu character;s eatong diprder in the fim, dispapinting to me. they hinmetd at ot boy thee wasnlt a come0to-seeing-Jesus-in=youscrambeld-eggs moment.

Uma ThormanL i am oetrally too or to be in this snowy movie. i know i know, shot on me fpor having the name NDERA knstead of ANDREA...

Dvod Drqoetety: as a unk kid y sjot=eatong geonm os cute, as an adult tho ot's...

Afghan Ehogs: we are no Slcie In Chaons...

Elel Macpherson: rememebr when i wa rlevant enought o have a dog named ater me?...

DorL and we sart wioth a little Tom Petty...oh io like those snowllows...excvapt i wouldnlt vall them snowlots, they;re just cool cars woth cool trnafformner atatachments on them.

takahshi: it is cool how they are able to drove the snpwplow on the strete like a normal car.

DorgL they say you have to iprovise in jazz, but not THAT way, Wullie;s  iwllie. 

laeryos; bacl when golf on tv was nice and safe and Tiger-Woods;ess all-white like ths now...

M ocale rarport:L vegan bitchers are nw on bpogue, gthey vot tofy. i tenmders hmy liens here moot and i am never miute. do you kalc off to your own nudes? some sperm is nevr swllowed. not my monoig here still holds, it stands toime. ot;s truel sueprmdels are nottled hope. hope for a new betetr day for men. yeha actually bacl them many bots lep thepr walls COVERED in lady posyters woth tape and ot was seen as puebrty and innocnet.

Koro=sensei: the eha din your ferezer is me...

Rapaport: i;m not tleling tales out of shci her we all knwo Uma Gurman is bad in bed...

Rosie I';dibenkl: what abnout MY monllgie!...i ahve bog tits and a bog assm too, i HSVE a coat that hamgs on hem kost roght...

Martha Plimpton; you can only have bot you anlt have,. you have to lvoe someone woth all your soul but never be deosrate about it...

Natle Portman: nrown diamonds? come on, that isn;t romanntoc, thatls poo, those wer bsously blood diamonds. wait for me and we;ll wlak the world togetehr...og bntoher...

Forgl ella s Tom oety saos, the aotong is the ahrdest part...

Natrliel i eman t elats they ADDRESS ot in the gilm, they tlak of Rpna Polanski and how Nabokov;s Humbert Hikebrt is extraonsidious cos he;s a cleancite professpr with elnow aptches isntead of an old fat bald dirty old man woth a amsitache and glasses and short beoge aons and ziuo=up jakcet and zofgzag socks. i dodnlt wnat a lsos in the end bot they setteel dona  cheek=kiss...

Natlie: my Bornwies troup would have razzded me? ph, broen foamongs, right...

Laeryyus; the reuqited bar singalong. ebetu bar kst ahve a piano. at elats ot wanlt he Cherros theme...

Natlie: what was i doing gping down onto absnement anyway?...

Dorg: dyslecix Romeo & Juliet, ha couldn;t get awu woth that now...

Tmpothy Hottonl when i bet ejalous of a 13=ea=op;d bot, here;s sormhting wrong with me...

Dprgl we all want soething ebaotiful...waot let me rephrase that...

NarlieL hos forend atcually ahd to RE<MOND hom i am a zygote...

Rarpapaort: bacl them the bogegst comnspiracy in this country was that all women were in a scret Sister Dorortity...

Rye: we NEED a Sister Dorortiy now! of compasison,e spiclaly netween van Rachel Eood and Vaness Broany...

Uma: Mir orvino: het rmemenr that Van Morrison [ergoemcnce on Leetrman? there was a guy in the Before trilogy films/ i onl noticed the stunning relatable Celine. tr,enr when Lars vo toer dod Oprah? i elared so kuch anour Rkentom Tatrntono forp mora Drbino...

Laeryus: frpnd swho have to isnult wahc ohe to probve theyr;e foends? bat foght> onlt hting misisng is {eter Berg...

Eye; it is like th hpotal scne ein The Sr eddociton at the end there, babe. i do like the momnlpgye pf Matt dillon, relaizien there are ,imits pt beong a joghsochoo fototbals tar. he dreamt here was a woman w oth him...

Maroth: don;t obsess over the one that got away, look at the oen inf ront of you, wpery about the one who is lyet to come...

Rapaport: those wer real etars outta me, too, at thr end there, i crajsed my snowlow into a gree, te sets bacl then had no saftey standards...

Eye:L the one good picec of fanction of thos film i read was aput a seoqe scenario where Marry does frow up past 18 and she and Timothy Hotton meet for drinks every fove eyars or so to see how theor lives are going at a bar in New Yprk of course. Marty has neevr stpepd pining for him even intoa duklthood bot she rlizes it kosg is ebevr gonna happen.