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TAGESANBRUCH
the door...........................was locked all along.Cotard: i can't get to my mother. but i can see her. she's slumped over on the bed, wrapped too neatly in her covers, forever, never to move...
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REALITY
learned:* 111: Illuminati Just Starting Out* postnuclear nuisances suck, but if you have a picnic basket you can at least get rid of the bear.* narrator: Vault Boy, what are you doing? why aren't you...
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TMIT: GET OUT OF THAT LITTLE HOUSE
my travels take me to Iowa where................wait, stop filming please. what am i doing here? what's the point of this? what's the point of any of this?1. when was the last time you changed your...
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PHOTIC
the scene up on screen transitions to an old '20s black-and-white featuring a steaming oncoming train, a damsel in distress tied up on the tracks, an evil villain in a Lincoln hat twirling his...
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CAM VS. THE COMPUTER: THE HAPPY SUPER BOWL
this Sunday there will be a little game of catch. and some running. the Broncos hope not too much running.pregame learned:* no matter who loses, the NFL wins. just think about that as you're placing...
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TMIT: THAT'S IT
you don't have to be lonely this Valentine's Day. join an orgy.postgame learned:* DAMN NATURE YOU CUTE* if you're dealing with opioids, you have much bigger problems than the bathroom. don't you guys...
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HIL
Binny (holding up her ipad mini): the thing about this life is.........it all eventually fades away....Rumi: what's that say on your insta? nice tits?Binny (scrollin'): nice tats. which is strange cos...
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THERE IS NO SWOON
Valentine's Day learned:* did you know that Baby New Year is related to Cupid? that's not true but it sounds like something that could be true.* Venus, Cupid's mother: hey! what are you doing with...
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TMIT: BUSTA
1. in winter does your sexual appetite go on a fast? it's coming......it does indeed come fast. it's okay, though, when you lose one appetite the other appetites are enhanced. i'm so hungry right...
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TO PLAY THE GUITAR WITH YOUR FEET
WE ARE STILL IN DISTURBED TIME, CLICK HERE, RIGHT HERE AT THIS LINKa horse rides boldly across the plains, like an oncoming train, proudly defiant as it eyes its target. its love target. no sand colors...
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PABLO
learned:* Vault Boy: charisma? i thought you said another word that sounds similar.narrator: that's disgusting!Vault Boy: carrom, i thought you said carrom.narrator: no.Vault Boy: nok hockey?* meatball...
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TMIT: VAMONOS
1. how many people do you really trust? see the first pic above. finale tonight! only on Fox (Mulder).2. what are you excited for? talking to friends again...3. have you had sex today?...
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THROW THE STONE, HIDE THE HAND
Cotard: what if...............it was all a dream?...............................just kidding.Codrus: you're not far off.a train comes barreling towards the two seekers. unnatural. with Soul Train...
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MARK TWAIN
learned:* Happy St. Paddy's Day!* narrator: got your rabbit's foot?Vault Boy: no. bye.* narrator: life is fragile.Vault Boy: in the postapocalyptic world?narrator: in general. it's a coin flip. go ask...
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TMIT: DiSNAPRIO
Oscars postgame learned:* they don't call him Leap-year Leo for nothing.* Leo's story proves that if you keep plugging away as my dad always used to say, keep struggling, pushing through, against all...
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CIRCLE ROOT
where am i going? how can i know if i've gotten there? what defines definition? what if there are no details? what if it's all just the curtain? if it keeps going forever, when does it stop? will you...
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KEEP PLUGGING AWAY
learned:* Vault Boy: doctor! do not saw off my leg with a cartoony bendy saw!doctor: why not? it's infected.Vault Boy: the Smurf Village is growing on it!* Vault Boy: the radiation made me grow two...
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TMIT: THIS BUD'S FOR US ALL
R.I.P. Bud Collins, without you i'd still be into baseball. and i'd still be wearing bermuda shorts.1. have you ever devoted an entire day to sex and sexual activity (with breaks for eating)? planned...
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BABELITY
the house. is a shack. the house is situated in the middle. dead middle. a house of no end. creepily creeping. of pasta. it has dilapidated over time but it still holds up. it's gray with white...
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AGENT EINSTEIN
learned:* Vault Boy skips along with his dunce hat on.homeless monsters by the side of the road: at least he gets to go to school.* narrator: an empty mind is....................what you have.Vault...
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